So Blogpatrol says the #1 search term that brings people to this blog is
wait. for. it.
That cracks me up to no end. As a result, I shall endeavour to use the words "bifurcated uvula" at least once in every post from now on. I will own this search term forevermore
I have no life, as you can plainly see.
In other news: Oh, don't you wish you'd had a movie camera at my house today???
Why? you may ask. Because today, for an hour, I entertained my neighbors with my hilarious antics trying, for the first time, to drive a tractor and operate a front-end loader. Yep. Nothing thrills the crowds like dropping the bucket down too far, and lifting the drive train clear off the ground.
All this with a seven-year-old kibitzing, with helpful comments like, "Mom! You missed the snow with that run!"
See, my dear hubby decided to cap off Saturday night by trying to clear the 21+ inches of snow from the driveway. As he backed the tractor out into the driveway, and immediately after he pulled behind BOTH cars, the old John Deere stalled. Frozen fuel lines. Joy. He decided to pop the transmission into neutral and push it out of the way. Enter the layer of ice under the snow. His left leg slipped and his MCL decided to liberate itself from its insertion point.
Did I mention the cars were trapped by the tractor in the driveway?
Had to call 911 to take him to the hospital, where they put him in an immobilizer and gave him a set of crutches. He promptly left town for a 10-day internship at the State House.
So here I was, with 52 inches of snow blocking my driveway, courtesy of the county road crew. I swear, they imported snow from the next street over to get the mound that high. Spent two hours shoveling that out yesterday, so I could drive my car through the yard (yep, I'm now glad I bought that SUV!) and get to work today.
This afternoon, however, the temperature warmed up sufficiently to start the recalcitrant tractor.
Did I mention I've never driven a tractor before? In my life? Until today.
OK, it wasn't pretty. In fact, I was the very picture of Lucille-Ball-in-the-candy-factory incompetence. But I have 145 feet of clean driveway out there now.
I am woman. Hear me roar.
Oh, and "bifurcated uvula"