Tuesday, April 15, 2008

See? This is what happens when you don't let people drink beer!

I gotta wonder what was going through the minds of the upper management at Prosper, Inc, when they found out they were being sued for waterboarding an employee during sales training.

What. The. Fuck?

The two quotes are priceless:

"We're not the mean waterboarding company that people think we are," ...said their General Counsel.

So we're...what? The Friendly Waterboarding Company? WTF? They pay this guy to be a lawyer???

"How many times did the CIA even do waterboarding? Three times?" added Dave Ellis, the company president.
"But look at the damage it did to America's reputation," Brunt pointed out. "And it's going to hurt our image."

Ya know...you torture one freakin employee...dang, a little pair of thumb screws or somethin'... and suddently you're Vlad the Impaler or somethin', ya know?

I'm reminded of the SNL skit, with Faster, faster! Cody wants a pony!


winter said...

What. The. Hell?!?

Sweet Jebus, it sounds like something you'd see on "The Office". I had to check the date to make sure it wasn't an April Fool's prank by the reporter.

I've managed sales teams, and I never found yelling at/drawing on/attempting to drown them to be an effective way to keep them going. Reward them when they succeed, help them when they don't.

Some people are just too dumb for words.

Qwhby - Welsh for "a creepy cousin who keeps trying to talk about porn at family reunions".

newwavegurly said...

Why the hell would anyone work for a company that threatens to make you stand while you work for an entire day if you don't hit your sales quota?

This is ridiculous. I didn't even friggin' know what "waterboarding" was until I read the article. I'd sue their asses too.

Beanie said...

Winter: Hey, I thought you were my creepy cousin who talks about porn! ;) lol

NWG: Yeah, I was thinking these guy make Glengarry Glen Ross look like the New Zoo Revue

winter said...

No, Beanie, I am not your qwhby. I am your gpifm - the person in your will to whom you leave your collection of Alf pogs.

I also love the Milgram redux angle: I'm thinking holding your co-worker down while your boss tries to drown him is perhaps taking company pride a shade too far.