Tuesday, January 15, 2008

God's Own Cheese

I had to make a late run to the grocery store tonight -- the cat was out of food and I figured it was better to blow 30 minutes of potential sleep time now than to face an entire night of yowling.

As I exited the grocery store, I noticed a packge of Kraft Cheese on the hood of my car. Just sitting there. Fully wrapped. There was no one else around, so I figured it was my destiny to take home the cheese.

My husband noticed the cheese as I unpacked the grocery bag.

Him: Why'dya buy cheese? We just bought cheese.

Me: I didn't buy it.

Him: You stole cheese?

Me: No; God left me this cheese. It was on my car in the parking lot.

Him: Well, you're not going to EAT it, are you?

Me: Why shouldn't I?

Him: Because...well, I don't know! Maybe it's poisoned or something!

Me: You are a very weird man. Why would God leave me poisoned cheese?

Him: Why would ANYone leave cheese on your car? Unless, of course, they were trying to get you to eat the poisoned cheese!

Martin Luther King's I Have a Dream speech is playing the background.

Hubby comments: What an amazing speaker. Really, I think it was a loss to the nation.

Me: You know, I hear he wasn't shot.

Him: Really? So how did he die then?

Me: I hear he got some bad cheese.

Him: I hate you.


rebecca said...

blessed are the cheese-takers.

Mississippi Songbird said...

lol...Love this story..
bunches of hugs!

Mermaid Melanie said...

the cheese dialog, for some reason, reminded me of a line from encino man. B. Frasier, be still my heart, is in the spanish bar, and repeats the phrase to the spanish guy about the cheese being old and moldy in reference to his girlfriend...

oooo tainted cheese..

rebecca's line is funny.